You are going to hell[}:)][}:)][}:)][}:)]

So the ol seven day bike riders came visiting you today, just in case you were a heathen that needed salvation
Regardless of who or what denomination, there are vast area's throughout the world they "could" be attending to the disadvantaged, other that a Western society like ours. [}:)]

Maybe just help to spruce hell up, I believe were already there [}:)]

lotofwind said...

You are going to hell[}:)][}:)][}:)][}:)]

Last time it happened to me I was back in Italy:

"Hi, have you welcomed the Lord in your life?"
"Hi! Wait a second, I've got the goat that's bleeding all over the altar..."

never seen them again.

the gibbo said...

Right on Buster, i wish they would just F u c k off
I wonder what the hit rate is, meaning conversions per door knock

Do they just work on the fact someone will be of thier head on acid on a sunday morning and they can work there goat herding magic.

It doesn't matter what the conversion rate is, they are forced to spend a certain amount of hours preaching/infecting..

I actually love them, I just ask more and more questions until they become visibly uncomfortable. You can really find out how they tick. A recent encounter went like this, it was all very exciting for me...


Me - Are you going to Heven?

JW - No, only X amount of people are allowed in.

Me- So off to hell the?

JW - No, I'm staying right here..

Me- For how long?

JW - For ever.

Me - So you will still be on earth in 1000 00000 00000 000000 00000 00000 years?

JW - Yes!

Me - Won't you get bored?

JW - No, we will be doing Gods bidding..

Me - Can't he do it himself? being all powerful and that.. How do you know all this?


That went on for a while, but it is funny as fark just asking "How do you know that?". They are forced to say the damnedest things..

I live in the first house in a long crescent,
A number of years ago,
The mormans, (same as jehovahs, just more annoying) canvassed our street, and they locked there bikes up to a street pole just outfront,
and proceeded merrily of down the street,
They must have been working extremely hard this particular morning,
because we could here abuse being hurled from 8 houses away,
I decided to be nice and fully service there bicycles for them, (very big of me, I recon, being sunday morning and all,)
So I grabbed my toolbox, and proceeded to remove every single part for a full inspection,
By the time they returned, only the frames were left locked to the pole,
And I was in my garage inspecting all the new parts ,
Suffice to say, they have never returned to our street
Ebay took care of the rest, $$$$

cantswm4**** said...

I live in the first house in a long crescent,
A number of years ago,
The mormans, (same as jehovahs, just more annoying) canvassed our street, and they locked there bikes up to a street pole just outfront,
and proceeded merrily of down the street,
They must have been working extremely hard this particular morning,
because we could here abuse being hurled from 8 houses away,
I decided to be nice and fully service there bicycles for them, (very big of me, I recon, being sunday morning and all,)
So I grabbed my toolbox, and proceeded to remove every single part for a full inspection,
By the time they returned, only the frames were left locked to the pole,
And I was in my garage inspecting all the new parts ,
Suffice to say, they have never returned to our street
Ebay took care of the rest, $$$$

You are definatly going to hell

I don't mind them, then again living in a small town, I know a lot of them so don't get bothered very often.

Last year they were doing a big drive over a couple of months and I had a 'pair' wander down my driveway. I was doing some maintenance on my & my son's pushy in front of the shed when one of the guys (a tradey I worked with on a few jobs) started going on about "how the world is witnessing God's wrath", and how we really should be living in "the garden of eden".

He then pointed to the artwork on the cover of the mag & said "wouldn't you rather your family living like this instead of the turmoil that you're living in now?" I motioned to my 2 kids - laughing & running around with the dog on the back lawn, the wife hanging the washing up on the line whilst my 6 month old was sitting under her feet, handing her pegs (after taste-testing them first), looked up & around at the blue sky, and said "I have no idea what 'turmoil' you're talking about...but this is pretty damn close to that pic you have on your mag there."

The subject changed to a work for a bit, the whole time they were looking around at the kids & dog playing & it was obvious that there was some envy there, then they happily wandered off. I got the feeling that they were starting to think 'why the feck are we walking around in these stinking suits when we should be at home, outside with our own families like this guy.'

I hope I showed them the light!

One thing I love about reading threads on seabreeze.

99% (estimate) of what is said is total sh1t.

The other 1% is just made up stories.

I kinda feel sorry for them really they dont have much in the way of fun or anything really to look forward to..
I mean Muslims go blow each other up and start wars when there bored.
And Jews are all rich
Catholics seem to look forward celebrating Christmas and birthdays and have Easter.

But what do Jehovah do? Go to bed early on a Saturday night after making sure there is no spelling mistakes in well being pamphlets and wake naked people getting jiggie with it early on a Sunday to cop a mouth full of abuse .
Pretty sad hey.

busterwa said...


I mean Muslims go blow each other up and start wars when there bored.
And Jews are all rich
Catholics seem to look forward celebrating Christmas and birthdays and have Easter.

WTF we doing in Iraq, Afghanistan, Libya, etc? Oh yeah we're liberating them.
So Christians like to liberate nations and then force them to swap their oil for worthless T-Bonds from the Jews.

20 years ago just after arriving in Perth I was in my lounge trying to fix my "out of Europe" 220v Tv that was old and keeping on switching it self of. Knock at the door, open, 2 Mormons there, they start the blabla... tell them very nicely that I have no time as my $#@!!*8 TV is giving me the $%!!*##!, one of the guy said _ I am a TV technician, can I have a go? Said sure mate but I am not interested in your religion! The guy said part of our mission is to do good and help when we can! He rolled is sleeves up and plunged in the back of the Tv, said just needed to be dusted as it was over heating and was a fire hazard..... did the job fixed the TV had a nice cup of coffee with them and they left. Never looked at them the same!

cantswm4**** said...

I live in the first house in a long crescent,
A number of years ago,
The mormans, (same as jehovahs, just more annoying) canvassed our street, and they locked there bikes up to a street pole just outfront,
and proceeded merrily of down the street,
They must have been working extremely hard this particular morning,
because we could here abuse being hurled from 8 houses away,
I decided to be nice and fully service there bicycles for them, (very big of me, I recon, being sunday morning and all,)
So I grabbed my toolbox, and proceeded to remove every single part for a full inspection,
By the time they returned, only the frames were left locked to the pole,
And I was in my garage inspecting all the new parts ,
Suffice to say, they have never returned to our street
Ebay took care of the rest, $$$$

Sounds to me you were a bit mean spirited in doing this. They are just struggling to survive like the rest of us humans.

felixdcat said...

20 years ago just after arriving in Perth I was in my lounge trying to fix my "out of Europe" 220v Tv that was old and keeping on switching it self of. Knock at the door, open, 2 Mormons there, they start the blabla... tell them very nicely that I have no time as my $#@!!*8 TV is giving me the $%!!*##!, one of the guy said _ I am a TV technician, can I have a go? Said sure mate but I am not interested in your religion! The guy said part of our mission is to do good and help when we can! He rolled is sleeves up and plunged in the back of the Tv, said just needed to be dusted as it was over heating and was a fire hazard..... did the job fixed the TV had a nice cup of coffee with them and they left. Never looked at them the same!

They couldn't have been mormons then. Coffee is a tool of the devil! A definite no-no! Same as alcohol, which is a bit strange since Jesus turned water into wine. I guess he won't be in mormon heaven then.
I suppose that means there must be separate departments.

That's how you get rid of them. Tell them your'e just making some really strong coffee and you insist they have a cup with you.
Might have been jumping jehovahs. You could offer them a blood transfusion maybe?

Little Jon said...

lotofwind said...

You are going to hell[}:)][}:)][}:)][}:)]

But GOD still loves you

no, that's jesus

jesus and god have got the good cop - bad cop routine going on