Unfortunately being that the gold coast seems to be increasingly full of ridiculously unsafe novice kiteboarders, it is only logical that someone address these issues in a drastic attempt to save the integrity of our sport, as well as the health and safety of riders and beach goers everywhere. Ready for a good rant?
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WHAT THE HELL is with all the board-leashed hacks clogging up lodders and shearwater this season???? It absolutely baffles my mind that there are so many people who have a clear disregard for their own safety and as a result continue to use this utterly stupid and dangerous piece of equipment, while making a mockery of kiteboarding.
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Today at shearwater a young boy, (after being hot launched by his father in 30knts, clearly not giving a damn about his son’s safety or having any clue how to kite safely himself), came in hysterical after his board leash slingshotted his board into his leg rendering him unable to weight bear at all. In tears, his father carried him to the car, and when a concerned kiter offered assistance and advice regarding the dangers of using a board leash, he disregarded the evidence, refusing to take responsibility for his son’s careless injury. This is only one example, I see it every single time I go out now and its just pathetic. Honestly, how can anyone even be this stupid? The simplicity of the matter only leads to one conclusion – people are NOT getting lessons by certified or EXPERIENCED kiters, and additionally don’t have brains inside their skulls.
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If you can’t use common sense to figure out why board leashes are dangerous, here’s a little step-by-step action sequence for you (on the principles of basic physics): You crash. Kite pulls DOWNWIND. You go DOWNWIND with the kite. Bungee cord leash STRETCHES. Board stays UPWIND, board leash tightens as you travel downwind, until tension maxes out and then what happens????!! The board has no where to go but DOWNWIND !!! where are you?? DOWNWIND!!! So you get a perfect smash in your leg or back if you’re lucky. I know 3 people personally who have had a nice big edge in the head from this exact event, resulting in traumatic brain injuries, never being able to work or ride again, and from then on needing someone to cook their meals and wipe their ass.
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OH, and also, what the hell is wearing a board leash even getting you? Besides half ass skills that don’t include BODY DRAGGING upwind??? When you learned to drive an effing car did you just not learn how to turn left? You are missing an insanely important skill if you are too lazy to body drag to your board. NO IKO school uses board leashes, as they are discredited. Any person teaching with one should be banned from the sport. Any shop selling board leashes should be ashamed of themselves. Any person using one should open their eyes and see that NO EXPERIENCED KITER USES A BOARD LEASH. Look around, people. Seriously. You put us at risk of getting banned by councils if you get injured (we are already on the edge with them) and you look like a total dickhead using one.
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Kite shops selling gear to people who have never kited before, without mention of the complexity of the equipment or how important it is to get lessons should be shut down. Kiteboarding is not for everyone, especially people who are too daft to accurately assess the steep learning curve and risk involved in the sport. Those of us who have been doing this for years are damn sick of new freaks thinking they can just buy random equipment on ebay, come and do dangerous **** on our beaches and be a dickhead just because they are too cheap to get lessons.
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ADDITIONALLY - without lessons, no one has the chance to tell you proper kiteboarding etiquette. So CHECK IT:
1) The person flying the kite is in control of the launch. The person holding your kite is not responsible for your ****ty launch, it is up to YOU to get in the right position (ie. NOT upwind of the person holding your kite)
2) kiters launching have right of way over those coming into the beach from the water. If you want to come in, and see someone launching, do another tack.
3) ON THE WATER: person on the starboard tack has the right of way.
4) ON THE WATER: if you are upwind of someone, put your kite UP. If you are downwind of someone, put your kite DOWN. makes for easy passing. not rocket science.
5) DO NOT jump unless you have 50m clear space downwind.
6) CHECK behind you before you turn.
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So here’s the point. You wear a board leash, or demonstrate unsafe practices on the kite beach or in the water that cause risk to other kiters or anyone else, you will be told. It is our responsibility to keep kiting SAFE and FUN and minimise risk through teaching proper technique to level headed people. We are all completely sick of this stuff happening, and unsafe kiters will be advised to either alter practices to be safe, or go do their dangerous **** elsewhere. I don’t give a crap if people think its harsh, deal with it princess.
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Kiteboarding is our life, and we all just wanna have fun. Anyone who is unsure of what to do, find an experienced kiter and they will be be glad to give you advice and help you learn the RIGHT way. HOWEVER, unsafe kiters who have an ego problem are NOT WELCOME and you will get an earful if you are disregarding your own or others’ safety. If you are unsure of what safe practices are, JUST ASK SOMEONE, and you get instant respect.